Fuck The Moralists

click to read the writing on the wall

Being parents of three school-aged children makes adult “alone time” a precious commodity. It usually amounts to; exhausted, post-homework, sibling-rivalry, eew-were-having-THAT-for-dinner, showers, get-ready-for-bed-already-for-the-umpteenth-time, collapsing-into-bed kind of “alone time”. There’s not really much quality (or quantity) in that, but we make do.

So for special occasions like birthdays, anniversaries, Valentine’s day… we try to devote a good chunk of the day alone together (and sometimes even overnight) as our gift to each other. Roses and candy could never compete with hours of uninterrupted fucking. So… Dick found us a couples’ “resort” of sorts that will rent a room (designed with sex in mind!) for 4 hours in the afternoon. PERFECT!

Since our children are young, this means finding someone else to take them so we can get away. This year, we aren’t able to swing the overnight thing but we got the Grandparents to commit to taking the kids for a good 8-9 hours during the day. The problem is…my ultra-conservative baptist mother keeps asking me what we’re going to do. What you have to understand is that the word “sex” was never uttered in my household when I was growing up. Dick keeps telling me I should just fess up that we’re stepping out for some rowdy sex.. Yeah, I can hear that conversation now…”well mom, we rented a sex room and we’re going to fuck our brains out all afternoon, OK?”

No, I don’t have to use those words, but it still leaves me feeling in an awkward position. Which is a little silly really. I mean, we ARE consenting MARRIED adults after all. My parents aren’t oblivious to the fact that we have sex (we have 3 kids for god’s sake) and it’s supposedly the most romantic day of the year. Yet somehow, the deep seeded notion that sex is shameful is embedded in my brain. So, like any good Christian girl would do, I lied. :o)